After reading Herland I began to wonder about others idea of marriage. One of the passages that I thought was interesting was a comment from the character Terry
“Might as well not be married at all,” growled Terry. “They only got up that ceremony to please us-please Jeff, mostly. They’ve no real idea of being married.”
Do you think the woman of Herland had the wrong idea of marriage or could it just be that today’s society have just developed the concept marriage?
My perception of this question is that the women of Herland did not have the wrong idea of marriage. Terry had a stereotypical view of marriage, he believed that the men was suppose to have the dominate role in the relationship. The women of Herland did not agree with the concept of men being superior. When I think of marriage I think of two individuals who join a union because of the strong love they have for each other. Herland was questioning the western society idea of marriage. In our society we cannot have a marriage without with men. Men are suppose to protect their wives and have the dominate role in the family. Women in the family are suppose to be nurturing and they have the responsibility to care for the children. In Herland the women played both roles, and therefore they did not need a man. So the only thing that their marriage was based on was love.
Another question that I had is do you think that women in today’s society are more like the women in Herland than the women in the past, when the story was written?
As I think of the women In Herland I see a lot of similarities to the women in today’s society. The women today have become more independent than ever. Women have their own jobs and make their own money. Many women today play both roles as mothers and fathers, just like the women in Herland. A lot of the women in today’s society do not depend on any man, and have developed the concept that they do not need a man to be whole. When this book was published, women were not as independent as we are today. It seems like the author wrote a book that relate to the women in her future, which is us. She wrote a book where women were independent, and a couple of decades later we have accomplished a part of her goal.
I would have to say that Terry views marriage so differently than the women of Herland because marriage is a social construct. It can be hard to believe because marriage is ingrained in our society, but Herland gives the perfect example of a society where marriage would have no reason to come into being. Marriage is merely a symbol of love; it actually does not physically do anything. Instead, as Terry shows, marriage can become a way in which stereotypes are intensified and false notions are kept going strong.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong, I'm all for marriage and want to marry someone one day, but I think that many marriages can just be vehicles for male dominance. However, I would have to agree that things have changed a lot since Herland was written. Women have gained a lot of ground and are much more independent then before. However, jokes about women and the kitchen still exist... Clearly we still have along way to go!
When you said "When I think of marriage I think of two individuals who join a union because of the strong love they have for each other. Herland was questioning the western society idea of marriage. In our society we cannot have a marriage without with men." I totally agree with you. I think that is why in Herland women are married to other women to show that the union is not about the sex of the parents, it is the love they share, and their ideologies of raising children. Herland, and especially Terry's character poke fun of the western idea of marriage, that women birth children and are the first protectors of their children by providing milk, thus shelter and safety. But, as Freud would agree, the father turns into the child's ideal because he provides his kids with protection by being the bread-winner, but also teaching them to have a sense of fear of their father. The father is "G-dlike" because G-d is supposed to offer protection, but through fear, for example, fear of going to hell by committing murder. At this point the mother is supposed to have dinner on the table, dustless countertops, and a perfect haircut. These are not supposed to be the results of getting married, what should be expected. Herland does a great job of illustrating this, as does Terry because his ideas are similar but when you read his lines you cannot help but think he is such an ass.
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree with you on the fact that marriage should be a union because of the strong love that two people have for each other. I believe this no matter what the sex is. However, today when people think of marriage they think of gender roles. Women making dinner, cleaning, watching the kids while the men or father is at work. To me this is not marriage, these are gender scripts. In Herland, the women married for the love of one another and to be a team in raising a child. Teryy in this case, is like most people today, viewing marriage as a role rather than for pure love of one another.
ReplyDeleteRegarding your other question, I definitely think woman today are becoming more and more independent. This is generalizing a bit because of course there are always going to be differences, but women have much more freedom and rights than they have had in the past. It is becoming clear that women and men can do the same work and play the same role in this society. Hopefully this continues in the future.